🧸 How much will it cost to raise a child from 0 to preschool?

Step one. And it's a big one! Because you're probably in America and how health insurance works here, your delivery costs could easily overshadow years of diapers and other concerns.

Most insurance plans include followups, etc., in the delivery package. Thankfully everything went pretty smoothly for us (despite having COVID at the time of delivery. 🤪) For a KP member, this package is covered by your regular plan benefits, with the major cost event being the hospital admission for the delivery.

KP isn't without its faults, but we far preferred KP's approach for its simplicity and predictability during a stressful time.

The big one. Spoiler: Childcare dwarfs other costs. There's a reason one of the biggest questions is whether a parent should work or stay at home.

Day 1 - Parental leave

We were lucky enough to be able to take off 6+ months and enjoy the opening stanzas of parenthood.

But the first three months were rough. Definitely get all the help you can. Three 8-hour shifts beat the heck out of two 12-hour shifts. Effective use of parental leave makes a huge difference. Don't let anyone convince you to leave it on the table. If you're in California, make sure you take the last month before delivery off, too! (This is based on SDI and is different than PFL. Read more.)

If you don't have family or folks to help in the initial nights, some folks get a night doula. That's probably the most expensive childcare of all, $60+/hr not unusual for overnights in the bay.

We just rented a snoo for the first couple months and had a great experience. They have a 6-month package now, but our daughter wouldn't have fit in it that long, even if she had needed it.

3 months - Nanny

By 3 months, we were getting reliable 5-6 hour blocks of sleep, and sanity started returning. If we'd had to return to work at this point, we probably would have gotten a nanny, but we held off until we returned from sabbatical overseas, around 10 months in.

We were lucky to find a family friend who knew a nanny who worked for a very fair rate. When she wasn't available, we did ok with finding folks on care.com and even some Facebook/Whatsapp groups.

We were really happy with the nanny route as a transition between work and daycare. I read up on this ahead of time, kids don't start benefiting from socialization until 18+ months. And adaptive immune system build-up doesn't really kick off until 2 (and it's not mature until 10). That said, burnt-out parents are not good for kids either. A nanny can be a good compromise.

My non-financial advice on nannies is to find someone on the younger end, or at least still physically able. We tried moving my mom to the neighborhood for the summer, but walking toddlers can be demanding for a 60 year old. Be careful about relying too much on family, especially if you're starting later.

Don't let the big numbers scare you too much: nannies cost more than daycare, which costs more than public school. These costs spike and go down quickly as the kids get more self-sufficient.

We started our daughter in daycare the day after her 2nd birthday. Only about half of daycares in our area support <24 months.

We've been super happy with it, and it was 50% cheaper than our very competitive nanny. (She'd also just found a job in tech, so everyone won.)

Daycare Approach

I've taken the 2025 pricing and modeled it based on the cost of 5-day childcare for a 4-month old. Call around to get this number for your area, or check your local subreddit if you suspect it's cheaper in your area.

Childcare totals

Now for a fun one. Diapers loom large in the mind of a new parent. All that time developing a gross-yet-necessary new skill: changing diapers.

Similar to diapers, formula is really going to grow that grocery bill. Especially in the wake of the 2022 formula debacle. But even with a big eater and imported Kendamil (not sponsored, just our favorite by far because it tasted the most like milk out of all the options), it's <$90 a month. Breastfeeding burns a lot of mom calories, considerably more than a $3 snack per day, so if you're going all-natural, budget at least this much for extra mom nourishment.

We followed standard protocol and switched to whole milk at 12 months. Bought by the gallon, milk is 85% cheaper than the formula we used, so we don't account for it here.

Interestingly, based on my research, the best way to bring down those costs is to get your little one onto solids ASAP. A staple enriched grain cereal (we like Beechnut Oats) is way cheaper than formula, and cuts diaper usage (and changings!) by about 25%!

Even if you're not planning on formula, it makes sense to keep a can on-hand, in case there are any speedbumps with breastfeeding (it happens). This is factored into the upfront costs.

These are what most people think of when they think of baby prep.

In some sense they're correct. I was surprised to learn that in most states the only thing you are required to have to pick up a baby, besides ID, is a carseat.

We went with quality over quantity here, e.g., just one compact-but-versatile stroller (the Uppababy Minu) But really the sky is the limit. One concession is that we opted for separate infant and toddler carseats.

You probably don't want to get toddler stuff at your baby shower, but there are some stuff it makes sense to buy at 18-24 months in.

Clothes vary widely between parents and communities. The Internet concensus seems to be that parents spend from $75-100 a month on their kids wardrobes.

We didn't spend nearly that much, especially because we were getting gifts and hand-me-downs from folks. We've spent around $40 a month so far.

You'll need a variety of other semi-durable basics, also estimated here.

Tbh, it might seem tempting to get really high quality stuff that you'll reuse the next time your family grows.

I've come to believe the greatest value you get is from experience. The savings of reusing a carseat is nothing compared to the wealth of knowledge of having seen something before.

Everything else!

Phew! Pretty heavy. Until I built this view, I'd never added up the numbers. I guess it never occurred to me that having a kid might make a dent in a down payment, but the numbers don't lie.

That said, we had our suspicions. It helped that we came to see the ballooning budget not as monthly recurring costs, but rather installments toward a large, but temporary, pricetag of having a family. So if you're in a similar spot, just remember: the numbers may look big, but they're not forever, and in most cases they're spread out. For us, even at $90k 3 years in, I feel like we've got the best deal in the world.

Hopefully you've also observed how quickly childcare adds up. It's freeing in a way, because you don't have to worry about optimizing for other costs covered here.

Personally, if you've read this far, I hope you're inclined to go for it. The world needs more diligent parents like yourself! 🤗

If you have more questions, there's always Q&A.